HOW TO LOVE SOMEONE WHO HAD EXPERIENCED MISTRUST AND FEAR?

What can you do if you feel in the deep of your heart that someone you care for is lost in a complex world of experiences he seems not being able to control or even face, though he is incapable of getting out of it because there stay not only links from the past but also some little one he cares for and wants to guide in future life?

It becomes an even more sad problem when you feel his anguish and the need he has to talk freely and be listen just like he has listen so many others. But it may happen that beside his proudly way there is an event from the past that acts like a firewall in his confidence in you. Something that happened like a frivolous though unhappy joke but gained unexpected proportions that are so hard to destroy that you do not know how to deal with them.

Our world is know full of marvelous experiences that allow us to be who and how you want to be known and experience the power of living not only your pubic life but to free your imagination without taking any risks. Unfortunately this is not the case! Your secret lives may become much more known that your public life and give you much unexpected troubles.

Worst if you are imprudent enough to buit one of this lives with someone that, loving you, knows  you almost more than you know yourself. At first she cannot agree it to be possible that it is you though she knows your words, phrases and thoughts and cannot atribute them to no one but you. She does not dare to believe  that besides what she loves and knows from you you might be that strange and unknown person that send unexpected and dreadful words and  images. When you discover – and you fell you need to do it or you will start trusting no one… – you fell not only sad but incapable to know how to deal with the situation. Something is broken that could only be recovered if talked about for no more than just a minute, because though there is nothing to be said about that virtual delusion you must talk something to preserve the link of your friendship.

Sometimes that seems to be impossible! Whatever you try time goes on and the person seems to need more  to preserve that secret, sometimes of hate and incomprehension, than to find the way to share it with the other that is living the same feeling. It seems it has become part of their life and you only know that that it is in you just like it is in the other.

Love is not enough when you are dealing with inhuman facts1 You love that person, just as he seems to love you, but you love him with human and sacred love and you know for sure what to do. But what can you do with someone who did never existed but in a virtual and almost evil relationship?

The problem is not the human creature you may meet, feel and worship but ‘the other’ that remains there and it seems that whatever you do she refuses to leave us apart.

In a way, that creature stays so deeply close to the true human one that it starts to direct his life in the most different ways. You are you no more because you do not want but because that new life surprises yourself and you become to need that constant surprise like an addition.

This is something so painful that you can hardly stop thinking about it, though you know you cannot do whatever it is because you are not allowed in that new world that though he may feel unhappy in it he is  starting to forget the way back. And, even if you may not have that perception, there is a lot of people trying to regain you without demanding anything from you but friendship and truth.

There is always a way back! And there, in that past plenty of joy, pain, love and memories there is a lot of people awaiting you. They may not be perfect. they may even have all those things you dislike in people. But in them you find the meaning things were made for the person you are.

Let tenderness, not money, be the climate of your world! The world is plenty of things to alienate you from the beauty of life! Be GOOD in you heart! Being good is not just doing good things but feeling well because you know your side is the one God wants  for you to live in peace, truth and nothing to be ashamed of. Because though we may not care on what other people thinks we know what we thought when having knowledge of what they did, what they suffer for doing so. Often you are the sweet company that put them in their previous way. Be that helping soul for yourself and, if possible, believe in love and friendship for good.

Have confidence! Let people be with you not only here but forever!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s